Reflections
Honestly, I have not thought about my "original" study abroad experience in years. Sure, I did a year of study abroad after I graduated from high school, but after college, grad school and work, my "experience abroad" has simply morphed into...life. Life abroad. The expat thing. Morphed into 8-5, church choir and, well...life. Most days, I don't even realize I am abroad. If you can believe that.
Earlier this week, Lindsay asked me to provide a picture of my study abroad experience for introductions during orientation. After some stalling ("we didn't have digital cameras back then") I scanned in the one picture that I thought summed up my year in Randolph County the best. It was taken after a marching band competition in Salisbury, NC, when our drum line and the pit won "Best Percussion." I was so happy. I was away from home for the first time, and I had been welcomed with open arms by everyone I met. By my host mom Deb; by our weird redneck neighbors with the thickest Southern drawl you ever heard in three counties; by Mr. Benji Springs, sick trumpet player and band director at Eastern Randolph High School. He allowed me to join band in spite of the fact that I did not play an instrument (learned clarinet in 7th grade..didn't stick with it). He said 'what can you play?' - 'Nothing, really.' - 'That's fine, you can play percussion.'
And so I did. During marching band season I played in the pit, as it was too late to learn how to march. I played the suspended cymbal and the triangle. I played at home games. I played in competitions. I loved it so much, I continued on to concert band during the second semester. German high schools don't have bands, and I, truthfully, love classical music and other such geeky things. Music makes me happy. And that day in Salisbury, when we won that trophy, I got to take it home for a day to pose for pictures. And yes, I made that uniform look good.
Today, I had the chance to talk to one of our students studying in Germany. We skyped him in for orientation, and I was able to chat with him for a few minutes before the session started. After the typical pleasantries in English, I switched to German and we had a full-out conversation. It was so good to talk in the mother tongue. I was able to zone out the other people in the room and just focus on what he was saying, because if nobody else understands you, it's almost like you're in a bubble.
Oddly, I saw some things in him that reminded me of years ago. During my second semester abroad, I was stifled by the fact that I would eventually have to leave this place, so much so that in some instances I stopped getting to know people on a deeper level. I was so focused on what I would lose in June that I gave up before I tried. I told him to focus on what he is gaining, like I wish I could have back in the day. To live each day to the fullest. To meet people. To give of yourself for those precious moments, for 3-hour conversations about politics, for those afternoons you would never have in another lifetime. In a way, I feel sorry for people who are never able to leave their country because of the exchanges and changes they will never experience.
Studying abroad is a gift.
In my case, reentry culture shock was so strong, I gave up. Ultimately, I left my own country because I had grown, blossomed and flourished so much abroad that I felt stifled in the town I grew up in. All of a sudden, life seemed narrow-minded, racist, judgmental and well, stifling. I quit. And came back to the States.
I have lived in the States for many years, and yet I have never been to Canada or Mexico, even though they are so close. I have been a NASCAR fan for a while, but I have never been to a live race. I've watched TV shows set in NYC, but I never visited. My goal this year is to do more of these things: to live more fully. Not to live and regret not doing something. I was happy to cross New York off the list a few weeks ago. Canada is coming up in May. I am committed to do the things I have dreamed of while I still can.
Love,
Heidi
Earlier this week, Lindsay asked me to provide a picture of my study abroad experience for introductions during orientation. After some stalling ("we didn't have digital cameras back then") I scanned in the one picture that I thought summed up my year in Randolph County the best. It was taken after a marching band competition in Salisbury, NC, when our drum line and the pit won "Best Percussion." I was so happy. I was away from home for the first time, and I had been welcomed with open arms by everyone I met. By my host mom Deb; by our weird redneck neighbors with the thickest Southern drawl you ever heard in three counties; by Mr. Benji Springs, sick trumpet player and band director at Eastern Randolph High School. He allowed me to join band in spite of the fact that I did not play an instrument (learned clarinet in 7th grade..didn't stick with it). He said 'what can you play?' - 'Nothing, really.' - 'That's fine, you can play percussion.'And so I did. During marching band season I played in the pit, as it was too late to learn how to march. I played the suspended cymbal and the triangle. I played at home games. I played in competitions. I loved it so much, I continued on to concert band during the second semester. German high schools don't have bands, and I, truthfully, love classical music and other such geeky things. Music makes me happy. And that day in Salisbury, when we won that trophy, I got to take it home for a day to pose for pictures. And yes, I made that uniform look good.
Today, I had the chance to talk to one of our students studying in Germany. We skyped him in for orientation, and I was able to chat with him for a few minutes before the session started. After the typical pleasantries in English, I switched to German and we had a full-out conversation. It was so good to talk in the mother tongue. I was able to zone out the other people in the room and just focus on what he was saying, because if nobody else understands you, it's almost like you're in a bubble.
Oddly, I saw some things in him that reminded me of years ago. During my second semester abroad, I was stifled by the fact that I would eventually have to leave this place, so much so that in some instances I stopped getting to know people on a deeper level. I was so focused on what I would lose in June that I gave up before I tried. I told him to focus on what he is gaining, like I wish I could have back in the day. To live each day to the fullest. To meet people. To give of yourself for those precious moments, for 3-hour conversations about politics, for those afternoons you would never have in another lifetime. In a way, I feel sorry for people who are never able to leave their country because of the exchanges and changes they will never experience.
Studying abroad is a gift.
In my case, reentry culture shock was so strong, I gave up. Ultimately, I left my own country because I had grown, blossomed and flourished so much abroad that I felt stifled in the town I grew up in. All of a sudden, life seemed narrow-minded, racist, judgmental and well, stifling. I quit. And came back to the States.
I have lived in the States for many years, and yet I have never been to Canada or Mexico, even though they are so close. I have been a NASCAR fan for a while, but I have never been to a live race. I've watched TV shows set in NYC, but I never visited. My goal this year is to do more of these things: to live more fully. Not to live and regret not doing something. I was happy to cross New York off the list a few weeks ago. Canada is coming up in May. I am committed to do the things I have dreamed of while I still can.
Love,
Heidi
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