My Year to be Bold
I'm not really sure what brought this on.
I suppose, it may still be the lingering effects of the ex that once told me "You're so predictable. You never try anything new," when I ordered yet another broccoli and cheddar soup in a bread bowl at Panera's. Since we've broken up, I must have eaten my way through half the menu at that place, just to spite him. (Yes, I know he doesn't actually know I did, but that's not the point.)
The point, I think, is that I am becoming more ballsy and that I hunger do things that previously frightened me. Unlike the Jason Robert Brown song, I'm pretty much afraid of everything: heights, tunnels, water, flying, spiders, snakes, boats, boys, fast cars, death, injury, change, the unknown...well, and trying new things.
I set out this year to try one new thing each month. For no reason other than...I could. This is the land of opportunity, after all.
I sort of eased into it. In January, Linda invited me to see Silver Linings Playbook in Winston-Salem. I had never seen a movie in Winston, but what was my excuse? I didn't know her friend and I hate meeting new people? Suck it up, Heidi! I got lost on the way, but that's why we have cell phones now! The movie was incredible, and Linda's friend totally fun!
Then I went to mingle at a reception for the Greensboro Rotary Club, where I only knew two people. It was super awkward, but I held my own. And left rather exhilarated. Thanks, Denise!
In February, I performed with GCUMC's hand bell choir: one 15-minute rehearsal for 3 pieces. You know the director was desperate to ask someone like me...I've never been so lost in my life. But gosh, when you hit the right bell at the right time it makes this little melody with all the other bells :-) So much fun. I could get hooked on that.
I also randomly bought a bike. My sister Anita will be visiting me in July, and she asked if I could get a bike so she could explore. And I finally realized how much I had missed biking outside for hours, the wind in my hair, like I used to as a kid. Not-so-gentle nudge from my friend J. Visit to Target. Done.
In March, my friend Kaitlin invited me to go swing-dancing with her. It was her first time, too. And it was next to awful. I must be the most uncoordinated person ever - in the act of swinging, I actually stepped on the ankle of the girl next to me, and severed the strap of her shoe. Not my best moment. I'm pretty sure there was blood.
I did, however, spend a lovely afternoon at Childress Vineyards with scarf-sister Lisa. Not all new things have to be super scary! This was quite enjoyable, and I learned a lot! Three-course-meal and a nice bottle of Chardonnay, overlooking the vines and a lake? Incredible. (Also, happy 50th, Lisa!!!)
Now here I am, holed up in my cabin overlooking Lake Lure and Chimney Rock, listening to the ducks quack in the water, and the squirrels rustle in the leaves outside. It's such a peaceful setting, and I am enjoying the time away from work, traffic and chatter to just rest, relax and reflect. But the new me also scheduled two crazy things: a two-hour rock-climbing lesson tomorrow, and a two-hour trail ride (through water!!) on Wednesday.
I must be crazy.
Maybe I am crazy.
But it all just clicked when I started to get excited about going to St. Louis, MO, in May: I'd get to see Kofi Annan speak (what a first!) and add a new state to the list by walking across the Eads Bridge to Illinois (how cool and environmentally friendly). Only to receive a note that said "If you're claustrophobic, don't go up in the Arch."
Well, I AM uncomfortable in tight spaces, and intimidated by heights, but DAMNIT, I am going up in the DAMN Arch if it DAMN WELL kills me.
I will not let the naysayers stop me. I can do anything. I could go back to school and get a pilot's license if I felt like it.
I am done being afraid.
Have suggestions for new things I should try this year? Bring them on! Apparently, I'll try most anything once.
I suppose, it may still be the lingering effects of the ex that once told me "You're so predictable. You never try anything new," when I ordered yet another broccoli and cheddar soup in a bread bowl at Panera's. Since we've broken up, I must have eaten my way through half the menu at that place, just to spite him. (Yes, I know he doesn't actually know I did, but that's not the point.)
The point, I think, is that I am becoming more ballsy and that I hunger do things that previously frightened me. Unlike the Jason Robert Brown song, I'm pretty much afraid of everything: heights, tunnels, water, flying, spiders, snakes, boats, boys, fast cars, death, injury, change, the unknown...well, and trying new things.
I set out this year to try one new thing each month. For no reason other than...I could. This is the land of opportunity, after all.
I sort of eased into it. In January, Linda invited me to see Silver Linings Playbook in Winston-Salem. I had never seen a movie in Winston, but what was my excuse? I didn't know her friend and I hate meeting new people? Suck it up, Heidi! I got lost on the way, but that's why we have cell phones now! The movie was incredible, and Linda's friend totally fun!
Then I went to mingle at a reception for the Greensboro Rotary Club, where I only knew two people. It was super awkward, but I held my own. And left rather exhilarated. Thanks, Denise!
In February, I performed with GCUMC's hand bell choir: one 15-minute rehearsal for 3 pieces. You know the director was desperate to ask someone like me...I've never been so lost in my life. But gosh, when you hit the right bell at the right time it makes this little melody with all the other bells :-) So much fun. I could get hooked on that.
I also randomly bought a bike. My sister Anita will be visiting me in July, and she asked if I could get a bike so she could explore. And I finally realized how much I had missed biking outside for hours, the wind in my hair, like I used to as a kid. Not-so-gentle nudge from my friend J. Visit to Target. Done.
In March, my friend Kaitlin invited me to go swing-dancing with her. It was her first time, too. And it was next to awful. I must be the most uncoordinated person ever - in the act of swinging, I actually stepped on the ankle of the girl next to me, and severed the strap of her shoe. Not my best moment. I'm pretty sure there was blood.
I did, however, spend a lovely afternoon at Childress Vineyards with scarf-sister Lisa. Not all new things have to be super scary! This was quite enjoyable, and I learned a lot! Three-course-meal and a nice bottle of Chardonnay, overlooking the vines and a lake? Incredible. (Also, happy 50th, Lisa!!!)
Now here I am, holed up in my cabin overlooking Lake Lure and Chimney Rock, listening to the ducks quack in the water, and the squirrels rustle in the leaves outside. It's such a peaceful setting, and I am enjoying the time away from work, traffic and chatter to just rest, relax and reflect. But the new me also scheduled two crazy things: a two-hour rock-climbing lesson tomorrow, and a two-hour trail ride (through water!!) on Wednesday.
I must be crazy.
Maybe I am crazy.
But it all just clicked when I started to get excited about going to St. Louis, MO, in May: I'd get to see Kofi Annan speak (what a first!) and add a new state to the list by walking across the Eads Bridge to Illinois (how cool and environmentally friendly). Only to receive a note that said "If you're claustrophobic, don't go up in the Arch."
Well, I AM uncomfortable in tight spaces, and intimidated by heights, but DAMNIT, I am going up in the DAMN Arch if it DAMN WELL kills me.
I will not let the naysayers stop me. I can do anything. I could go back to school and get a pilot's license if I felt like it.
I am done being afraid.
Have suggestions for new things I should try this year? Bring them on! Apparently, I'll try most anything once.
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